Oh the places I've been, the things I could tell you! But the purpose of this blog is not to focus on the hardships, the pain, the anxiety, the deep deep depression, the medical neglect, the loneliness, the hours of crying, screaming, wondering 'why is this happening to me!"
The purpose is to focus on the positives, the learnings, the teachings, the knowledge of how you can start to tip the scales towards healing.
Whilst I will address all of the above negative feelings and emotions that surrounds you when you experience a chronic pain condition, especially a chronic pelvic pain condition; I'm here to take you on my journey, one that has changed the way I think about myself and my body forever.
Here are the 3 things I've learned about chronic pelvic pain:
1. You are the owner of your body and the decisions you make about it
This was a hard lesson to learn, and one I learned when I was at my lowest point. I had just had a failed medical procedure and was feeling like I'd set myself back years in terms of healing. The funny thing is that I knew intuitively, that it wouldn't work. I just didn't listen to my intuition, I didn't listen to my body. I wanted a quick fix, I was in major fight and flight mode, and so I gave all my ownership to a medical professional. I"ll say it again...I didn't listen to my intuition.
After watching the amazing documentary 'Heal' on Netflix I learned a lot, and so many things just clicked, I finally understood why I wasn't getting anywhere. I was putting all my hope in the hands of medical professionals to fix me. I wasn't taking ownership of my body, of the decisions about my body, my health.
This was a major turning point for me. From then on I no longer (and this is only 12 months ago), would I let anyone make decisions about my body, my health, for me. It would have to feel intuitively right to say 'yes' I am going to do that.
I now have the power back. I now am the owner of my body, my destiny, my reality.
Yes, sometimes it's hard when I have a pain flare out of the blue that cripples me, and I want to run to a medical professional to scream 'fix me!' But I know that is my old friend anxiety talking at me - so I just stop, take some deep breaths, do a mediation, and tell myself....'babe, you got this'.
2. Your mind affects your body, your thoughts affect your pain
Another big learning for me was discovering the work of Dr Joe Dispenza and reading his book 'Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself'.
I was already trying not to focus on my symptoms, staying present, staying positive, but his story and his book made all the pieces click.
Stay with me while I touch a little on my interpretation of the science behind it (physics).
We are all made up of energy and matter, everything on this planet is. From one being to another, all we are is energy and matter. This means that we can influence our physical being (matter) by our non-physical state (energy).
Your thoughts have consequences so great that they create your reality.
You can listen to Dr Joe Dispenza, who explains it better than me.
Once I understood that my thoughts, which were me living in the survival mode of fear, were greatly impacting my physical state, my physical chemistry. It made sense why I was stuck. Literally stuck in survival mode. Stuck with pain.
I started to read more, learn more about energy and how you can shift it to a higher frequency in order to heal. This blew my mind, and so I started to meditate everyday. To "raise my frequency of matter" (Dr Joe's words), with new information to change my energy. Change my thoughts, change my reality.
Once I tuned into this, I could directly see the effects of my mood on my pain. If I got upset, distressed or super anxious my pain increases. It's crazy but true. I've reluctantly tested this experiment on myself many times. The result is always the same - pain.
But focusing on a new reality, through affirmations, mantras, visual meditations, guided meditations, you can start to change your energy, change your thinking patterns, raise your frequency and it's all within. I have the chemistry to heal myself and so do you.
3. Pain 100% of the time comes from the brain
This also blew my mind which is a concept that comes from Dr Lorimer Moseley, a Pain Scientist from Adelaide.
I thought pain was in the tissue, I'm sure you might too.
There was a time when I thought my bladder was damaged, my pudendal nerve was damaged, the tissue was damaged and that I needed a new bladder, a new nerve to be better; but listening to Dr Lorimer Moseley flipped all that on my head and aligned so much of what I was learning from Joe Dispenza.
Pain unfortunately is there to protect you, but your body doesn't always get it right and can get a little too over protective - hence why we have chronic pain conditions. The body has become over sensitized, sending alarm bells where there shouldn't be.
In realising this, I knew that it was a simple yet not so simple matter of 'mind over matter'. In order to heal, I needed to and still need to calm my autonomic nervous system, calm down the pain signals to the brain....convince them that I'm safe, that all is ok, all is well. Nothing to worry about here!!
This is easier said than done, but once I learned more about pain and how it works, it took away some of it's power over me, it took away the fear of the pain (a little bit). It gave me my strength back.
Learn more about pain by Dr Lorimer Moseley.
The Pelvic Warrior